But if you are going for a walk
why do it alone
why not share it with a cow
if you do it right
you might get a friendly face licking
what more could you want
go up to a cow
grab her by her ears
and let rip into her face
with the most bitchin banshee guttural vrol
you bloodying lungs
can push through
your straining throat
with eyes popping to tears
to tiptoes as your muscles tense up and
hair falls across your face
release.
Cow screaming can relieve stress
add excitement to a boring country walk
bring relief to muscular tensions
stimulate blood circulation
cure loneliness and
athletes foot gallstones
obnoxious tendencies
baldness
menstrual bleeding and tensions
Training before cow screaming
can help to avoid unexpected
stampeding
cow kicking and head butting
heart attacks blood clotting or strokes
talk to your doc-tor first
note there is research
suggesting evidence
that the recipient
might not appreciate cow screening
as much as you
but this has not been confirmed.
The poem performed on the album Unbearable Error
This poem was published in
Golden Hour - Hora Dorada and Beer Book
you can buy it by send a message with your address to
colm@ciarnain.com it costs 12€ + postage
here at Litteraturcentrum Kvu
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